Comments on: How to prepare for rejection https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/ & Gray-Grant Communications Sat, 23 Jul 2016 14:18:00 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.8.1 By: Daphne Gray-Grant https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8022 Sat, 23 Jul 2016 14:18:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8022 In reply to LJ.

Wow! Papering the wall with rejection letters. That takes some guts!

]]> By: LJ https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8021 Sat, 23 Jul 2016 12:25:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8021 A fellow member in my local writers club–the California Writers Club-started the rejection generator so I forwarded your post to him.
I’m definitely a defensive pessimist and scored well in that direction. I like to view it as “under promise and over deliver.” Rejection is just part of life–and humor helps. I knew a man who decorated his basement family room with all the rejection letters he’d ever received–they were fun to read!

]]> By: Rohi Shetty https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8019 Thu, 21 Jul 2016 04:19:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8019 In reply to Petruta.

Hi Petruta,
You need not apologize. I found your comment really helpful – it’s long but not verbose. 🙂

]]> By: Daphne Gray-Grant https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8017 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 18:52:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8017 In reply to Petruta.

I really agree with an attitude of saying, “thank you for the time and effort to improve my manuscript.” I also like the way you’ve specified both saying it aloud (to the editor) and holding that same feeling in your heart. After all, doing the former without the latter won’t make YOU feel any better. Having a generous attitude is just a better way to live!

]]> By: Daphne Gray-Grant https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8016 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 18:48:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8016 In reply to Rohi Shetty.

That’s hilarious, Rohi. The cartoon would have made a great illustration for this post!

]]> By: Petruta https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8015 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 17:17:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8015 This article and Fred’s notion of “Optimist with a Backup Plan” are very helpful. I believe the article is especially helpful in conjuncture with PW#528: “Why writers should give and receive more thanks”.

Perhaps an optimist can be turned into a pessimist or a despondent or a Chameleon by the environment if he does not find resources to stand up. I see Daphne and the community created around her website as such a resource. One effective strategy to prepare for and to face rejection is perhaps to say in our hearts and to the editors/ reviewers “thank you for the time and effort to improve our manuscript “. It does not require one to agree with everything said or ignored, but it requires a rejection of bitterness. It is also important to be supportive to colleagues and people we supervise as well as to our boss when we or just them are hit by a rejection. A way of preparation for rejection is to make our environment more understanding by being more understanding to the people around us.

And yes, “patience is continuous good humor” (Nicholas Belyaev). I find the idea of funny rejection letters to be of therapeutic value. We could just rewrite the official rejections we receive in such funny ways as the letters Daphne posted and patiently improve and persevere in the stormy reality.

Please forgive the verbosity; brevity is something I really aim to learn from you all.

]]> By: Rohi Shetty https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8014 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 15:47:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8014 Hi Daphne,
So a defensive optimist plans for the best but is prepared for the worst?
My absolute favourite story about the right way to deal with rejection letters is from a Peanuts strip:
Snoopy (reading the rejection letter from an editor): Please don’t send us any more of your stupid stories. Please, please, please.
Snoopy (with a beatific grin): I love to see them beg.

]]> By: Daphne Gray-Grant https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8011 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 04:17:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8011 In reply to mat loup.

I haven’t read the book yet but I’ll be interested to see if she gives projections for what % of society fits each type….

]]> By: mat loup https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8010 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 02:59:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8010 Looks like I’m a defensive pessimist too. I wonder if it’s a writing thing…:)

]]> By: Daphne Gray-Grant https://www.publicationcoach.com/how-to-prepare-for-rejection/#comment-8009 Wed, 20 Jul 2016 00:18:00 +0000 http://pubcoach2018.wpengine.com/?p=15221#comment-8009 In reply to Nagaraj.

Nagaraj, I think there’s a difference between always imagining the worst and simply preparing for it. (The researcher uses different terms for them: dispositional pessimism vs defensive pessimism.) It might be interesting to get her to do the test! (You and she might also want to read the book, The Positive Power of Negative Thinking.)

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